{now, im seeing but im not believing}

I got pulled over by the police today for making a U-Turn. I totally objected to the matter for the simple reason that there was no presence of an identificatory sign. I cried, and complained. I was "excused" in the end, happily ever after... It was a degree less embarrassing then when I got stopped by a cop-on-a-horse who wanted to fine me for J-walking!!

Above is one of my favorite scenes from the conveniently-named U-TURN movie with Sean Penn, Claire Danes and Joaquin Phoenix... It came from Stray Dogs by the master John Ridley and Oliver Stone had the heart to direct it. He brilliantly accomplished the task of bringing to life this little underrated gem of a film where humor is shielded by subtlety and taunting sardonicism. Needless to say I love it.  Have you seen it?

{chaos-control-chaos-control}

"We flip it around for variety" - Donald Sutherland´s character expressed delightfully during a very memorable scene from the movie Six Degrees of Separation. A side note on the brilliance of the film, strong characters and dialogue. Will Smith at his finest, particularly during his - Catcher in The Rye Thesis - monologue. Well worth watching several times to capture every word about imagination....

Another protagonist in this film is Kandinsky, the Russian painter along with two of his very famous artworks; "Black Lines" and  "Several Circles", except in this occasion they´ve merged them together into a one-sided form in order to create a meaningful correlation between art and the film. You can watch a mini clip of the characters showing off their multifaceted prized possession...

Duality. Isn´t everything in life some way double sided? We say that there are two sides to every story, and we flip a coin for head or tales in order to make a decision, right? The way I see it, we always have at least two choices in everything we face in life. You can take the easy way out or fight the hard way, you can change paths into a different direction or continue whatever it is you're doing. You can ride on the wave of chaos... or control...

Or better yet, find the balance between these two. This is something particularly hard for me. As Ive shared with you in the past (ok, yesterday), Im a bit of an extremist so balance is something Im constantly striving for. But I can´t help but think that things get much more interesting when you add up different angles or points of view, don´t you think? 

For example, I love pink. Im gaga for tutus, Audrey films, tea at The Ritz and baby pandas. But there´s a whole other side to me, the one that devours film noir and anything Orson Welles, respects sarcasm (Im obviously lying here and I despise it) and the obscurity of Edgar Allan Poe and other not so Winnie The Pooh-esh type of things... And don´t even get me started on the different types of men I´ve had the immeasurable pleasure of dating or being in a relationship with. Night and day. Oil and water.  My taste in music also has a wider range than Meryl Streep´s acting abilities and I can switch from Sporty Spice to Lazy Spice in a split second, not too proud of this last one...

Look at Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, the example may be quite exceptional but let´s examine this for a moment. Ok, so this guy is a little beyond bi-polar and I would imagine slightly aggressive during courtship but if I were to remove something so minor like his dissociative identity disorder, I would totally date him. You get two guys for the price of one! Perhaps a bit morally disturbing but the taste of both worlds nevertheless. Remember to "flip it around for variety".

And let´s not discount the universally acclaimed -Looking at the glass half full or half empty-, ok that´s a difficult one... How do you meet this one half way? If you have any ideas, please let me know, Im not very good at math to begin with! I guess technically, the glass is always full and Im getting pretty thirsty now so Im gonna go....  

{cinco de mayo! sales commission, bye-bye-o! }

We´re talking 1997 and since then every May 5th I can´t help but think of one thing: Seinfeld´s Millennium episode. Number 20 of the 8th season. This photo might stir up some memories for you...

The script reads: 

Elaine tries to run an ethnic-themed clothing store called Putumayo out of business after receiving bad customer service. First, she tries shopping at a competing store, Cinco de Mayo, but discovers that the same woman from Putumayo owns both stores. Later, she tries to get Kramer, under an alter ego named H. E. Pennypacker, to change the price tags on the labels, but he accidentally destroys the pricing gun before he can finish. Instead, he tries to take the desiccant packs from the clothing as Plan B, so he only manages to ruin the clothes in about five years, making Elaine more distressed and presumably gives up. Kramer then eats some free chips the store gives out to its customers and unknowingly drops one of the desiccant packs in the salsa dip.

We don´t actually celebrate this holiday in Mexico, even less in Argentina (my home planet) but if I had to party to this one, Id say get chips, salsa and watch this episode! 

Happy Cinco de Mayo, bye-bye-o!

{if you rely on hand gestures to get your point across, you can thank fish for that!}

Scientists have found that the evolution of the control of speech and hand movements can be traced back to the same place in the brain, which could explain why we use hand gestures when we are speaking. And you thought it was the italians!!

{Professor Andrew Bass (Cornell University), who will be presenting his work at the meeting of the Society for Experimental Biology on the 3rd July, said: "We have traced the evolutionary origins of the behavioral coupling between speech and hand movement back to a developmental compartment in the brain of fishes."

"Pectoral appendages (fins and forelimbs) are mainly used for locomotion. However, pectoral appendages also function in social communication for the purposes of making sounds that we simply refer to as non-vocal sonic signals, and for gestural signaling.

Studies of early development in fishes show that neural networks in the brain controlling the more complex vocal and pectoral mechanisms of social signaling among birds and mammals have their ancestral origins in a single compartment of the hindbrain in fishes. This begins to explain the ancestral origins of the neural basis for the close coupling between vocal and pectoral/gestural signaling that is observed among many vertebrate groups, including humans.

Professor Bass said: "Coupling of vocal and pectoral-gestural circuitry starts to get at the evolutionary origins of the coupling between vocalization (speech) and gestural signaling (hand movements). This is all part of the perhaps even larger story of language evolution." sciencedaily.com }

Above: John Cusack gesticulating away with his pretty hands. 

{and my buns, they don't feel nothin' like steel}

Im having a Tai Fraser moment. I know, I have many of those, I can´t help it... Amy Heckerling made Clueless my bible when I was a bitty witty teen. That woman has some word power!

Today I went hiking, as I do every morning (well except when I stay up really late watching Seinfeld reruns and I can´t get up the next morning, oh and Sundays, as if!). I absolutely love the feeling of accomplishment that I get when reaching further heights, I literally get high on being high... And I have so much fun up in the hills, when Im on my own and I can just play around pretending Im in a musical or some stage like The Voice. Ive been working on my coreo for Nina Simone´s I love To Love  ♪  ♬ ♩ "I just need a guy with a Frank Sinatra touch" ♪ ♫ ♬. You´d be surprised at how excellent Nina goes with hiking, good combo for any day of the week ... except Sundays!

As I was stabilizing my position for my grand presentation, I saw not one  but TWO hotties pressing their brakes on downhill grade and just passing me by. I got a little embarrassed of course, considering I was thinking that the hills were completely my own and being a Saturday I had the best idea of them all, I went hiking in my pajama pants! I was not feeling very sexy, needless to say. But the thing that worried me most were my buns (referred to as bums in some hemispheres). Ass, behind, gluteus maximus, all of the above! I felt very self conscious for a moment about that rear-end and the fact that despite all my efforts, you could still pinch em´ with a certain ease...

(About twelve years ago I embarked on a pilgrimage towards Basilica de Luján in Buenos Aires. Thousands to see the virgen, I went along to tighten my thighs! Im not religious but I really needed the exercise. As I recall, I kept stopping every few miles to check if they were getting a bit harder. I didn´t make it all the way but I did lose a couple of pounds along the way so it was worth the effort!)

So in this moment I started having doubts whether this type of exercise was working for me, if I shouldn´t try running or swimming instead... This uncertainty made me feel really sad, how could I go from having the best time ever to been nothing-butt depressed? 

And before you start jumping to conclusions of whether Im bipolar or straight up insane, I should make something very clear. I am a bit of what you would call an extremist, an all or nothing kind of girl, Im working on it and it´s one of the reasons I created this web space. Im sorry it´s not just to make you happy... So I did feel a bit of frustration when I realized there was still a lot of something hanging loose back there. I had an - Ive been on a diet for a month and I gained 10 lbs - moment! 

But then I stopped for a moment and I thought about all the reasons I began to hike in the first place and it became clear to me that having buns of steel was just one in a bunch. And if I had to live for the rest of my life with a jelly jiggling backside, I would be totally ok with that, after all it´s my backside. And I would still have the time of my life going up the hill (backwards). I do that sometimes, to change the scenery... 

Sometimes our view needs to be widened, we get stuck on the little things that make us uncomfortable or unfulfilled and in reality we have a whole lot more going on. There is never a sole purpose for doing the things we do, instead it´s a combination of many goals that we conveniently tie into one. So try breaking this combo down and you will find a million reasons to be motivated to pursue whatever it is you're doing...

“It is a narrow mind which cannot look at a subject from various points of view.” - George Eliot

{i love her. and true love lasts a lifetime}

Emma Thompson´s character in Love Actually spoke fondly about her idol Jodi Mitchell. I find her to be quite depressing, Jodi, not Emma... please! But they say we can´t choose who we fall in love with so my continuance of opinion shall remain locked inside my little Pandora box... (cont.)

Ohhh, I can´t help myself, but the word Pandora always brings to mind one of the best lines in cinema history... and from "Spike" nevertheless!

"I knew a girl at school called Pandora. Never got to see her box, though...." 

How can you not love Spike? He´s the all time fantasy roommate, if you live in Notting Hill, did you see the prices of those flats with blue doors?! Eventually you´ll meet a movie star in your local bookshop and move out...

And speaking of falling in love, I can´t believe I´ve waited all these posts to share this with you... I guess we had to be further acquainted, its a matter of trust, you see.

I have a very special love, unconditional (until further notice, who knows). A kind of love that you feel will last a lifetime. Cherish, adoration, admiration... I just sighed. And Im blushing, I feel like Im in a confessionary and Im not even religious!

And whom do I have all these feelings for, you may ask. Well those close to me already know who Im talking about and now so will you... That guy that wore a leather jacket and a cross earring in the 80s, the one who got caught in a Beverly Hills park bathroom doing who knows what, the boy that evolved into one of the greatest singing voices in history... more clues? c´mon, it´s pretty obvious by now!

This man made me do things I thought Id never do! Im not going to go into all the emotional linings, that would be like 150 different posts, but I am going to share with you this particular adventure that I went on starting in the year 2006. I took a year off, let´s call it a sabbatical, to go wherever he would go. He was on tour back then, 25 Live. My very first concert was in Rotterdam and from then on... 18 more concerts... London, Paris, Copenhagen, Vancouver, Madrid, Barcelona, Milan, Budapest... and the list goes on... You could say Im quite fond of him...

I had the time of my life, travel, meeting "OCFs" (other crazy fans), seeing the love of my life over and over again and after a very cold wait, the chance to meet him, believe me this merits a whole other narrative but at least I will share my photo... and before you say anything, yes, he´s looking in another direction. My emotions were all over the lace to even look at was going on with the camera so the whining came until later...

But one day I came back home, on the verge of 2008 and something happened. I was crazy excited sharing my experience with friends and family and then...  All of a sudden I was back in the real world, in real time and a feeling of discomfort became my full time companion. What was going on? Ive just had a million dreams come true, isn´t that what its all about? Apparently not. I was feeling guilty, dissatisfied with myself. Believing I had wasted an entire year of my life instead of focusing on goals, my career, my future. I started to panic. I became isolated and desperate trying to figure out a way to make up for all "the lost time". How could someone like me, so driven and focused pursue such insanity? I had to get into therapy!!! 

Well, I did, although no couch or hourly rate were involved. I organized a conversation group with friends and we called ourselves The Lost Souls. No joke, desperate times call for desperate measures!! The six of us started getting together twice a week, just chatting, sharing as much as we could. That is when I realized that all my friends were cuckoo, like I didn't know this already! Aside from the obvious, amazing things started to occur. Thanks to the ears and brains of these ladies I slowly began to relax about this whole ordeal and started to see the wonderful things that I had actually accomplished. Perhaps a little unconventional but dreams are unique and very personal. 

This changed my complete outlook on life, I became FREE. These were my choices, my decisions, my resolutions. Mine, mine, mine. I had adjusted my vision and it was the best thing that ever happened to me... And this is when all the cliches come in handy: No more regrets, live the moment, each day is a new beginning... If you want to add something, be my guest.

No matter how many plans we make, we can´t predict tomorrow and nothing can take away our life experiences, which is why I became very determined to live my life this way, in motion, not letting opportunities pass me by. As long as those opportunities rank high in my standards and not anyone else´s. No one can tell you what things are important to you, this is something that you have to discover yourself. Find your own path and lead the life that you want. It´s the only way that you´ll ever achieve true happiness and fulfillment.

Sometimes we need a little push to get us started, we may find it in our careers, our families, animals, the planet or even a pop star, a very talented one... Following passion and love, because true love lasts a lifetime...

With that in mind, his new tour started later in 2008 and guess who was there? And Symphonica 2011? An intimate gathering at the Royal Opera House in London, even Elton John was there! You think I was going to miss that? I even dragged my mom to the concert. Now she´s an OCF!! Like we say in spanish "quien te quita lo bailado?". It translates into something like "who can take away the dance you´ve already danced". It sounds terrible in english but you get the picture....

Get up, get out there and go find your very own George Michael because you´re not getting mine!!!

{drinking with dead women writers}

I think I need to start making a list of all the books I need to get my hands on. There´s so many I even thought about starting an excel document so keep things in account. What do you think, too nerdy?

I would certainly be drinking wine while making new entries, as well as asking myself if Dorothy Parker would read it, I was inspired by this particular book that is currently number one on my list...

{you have the nicest pair of rhododendrons in town}

Patrick Dempsey was once a regular teenage dork with an edge that is, as he clearly went from geek to chic (and back to geek... in the length of 2 hours!) in Cant Buy Me Love... He was suave with the ladies, he had a special touch. What was it? If you re-watch the movie, as I have done at least once a year for the past 20 years, you may find that you agree with me in assuming that it all comes down to the art of complimenting...

Cindy Mancini, the prettiest girl in school... "The most beautiful girl in the history of this county" - Chuck said. - And yet a so unsure of herself, that she had to go and borrow her mom´s suede outfit which she had strictly been forbidden to touch. She went to the party in the outfit, showed it off to her friends (saying that her boyfriend had sent it to her from Iowa, because that´s where the finest leather comes from...), got red wine spilt on it and well, thanks to all this dilemma, there is a movie we can share!

So, this happened with high school kids but it seems we never grow out of it. Why do we care so much what people think of us? Why do compliments sometimes make or break our days? Why do the lack of compliments weigh over our every relationship? I mean, I sure dumped the guy who was unable to tell me how spectacular I looked in that red dress, believe me, SPECTACULAR.

That´s what social media was invented for, right? Compliments. We live in a world of likes and retweets letting those define our taste, our mood and our wisdom! I personally get ecstatic when you share my posts with others, if Im feeling down, that´ll do it. Im just making a statement, not criticizing in any negative way, so please continue sharing and bringing a smile to my face... 

But I am (a little) opposed to letting these things master my decisions. If you narrow it down, who´s opinion matters most to you, that of a total stranger or one coming from someone who cares for you and who you respect? Both, of course! Apparently it´s getting harder and harder to set these apart as we are spending more amounts of time with our virtual connections and awarding them more meaning than we (perhaps) should. 

Fishing for compliments, means you might not catch any! No matter how well-equipped you find yourself to be... But there´s a higher chance you´ll get some if you reach out to a larger quantity of individuals, I understand. Quantity has taken over quality, big time. I once opened a fake facebook account to give a like to the posts I submitted on the real one!! Losers unite, you might as well confess that you did it too. Fake account is now closed, it started getting lazy and not liking my posts anymore....

And this works both ways, don´t you sometimes feel compelled to like or share something someone else posted out of guilt or to make that person feel good? Sure you have! I like posts all the time and I don´t even read them! 

If you want to get some good compliments out there, here´s a great list gathered by Huffington Post for you to take a look at, cut and paste. And if you are looking for a compliment, let it come naturally, without expecting it, it feels so much better... better make a recording yourself on your phone and play it back for as long as it´s necessary. Something like - "Ale, you are amazing. The diet is working wonders, you look so much thinner "- play it until it starts to sink in.

SPOILER ALERT ... Although I don´t know if that even existed in the 80s!

In the end, Ronald and Cindy get together. They each realize that neither of them have to change to accept the other nor do they care what anybody thinks about them anymore. "Cools, Nerds, your side, my side, man it's all bullshit. It´s tough enough to be yourself."...

{it takes years to write a great novel. and it takes you just as long to write a shit novel}

Truth be told. Albatross. Just watched this movie, one of those peculiar ones in which you are convey ed into a feel good place yet the plot is quite sketchy and insecure. I enjoyed it, naturally. There´s a writer involved (Sebastian Koch, yum!), talk about his novel...There´s also Emelia, who has been deceived her whole life into thinking she was Conan Doyle´s great granddaughter (a clever touch) and well, that´s about it... Some website described it as - A coming of age at the English Seaside - That´s plenty for me, I will forever more be front row audience to anything remotely: Bildungsroman / Künstlerroman

Even if the dialogue goes something like this:

Beth: Do you need to call your mom to check?

Emelia: I would but, she's a bit dead.

Beth: Oh. Sorry.

Emelia: It's okay. Not very fair for you to take the blame. She *did* kill herself.

And these movies always teach you something, the worn out "moral of the story", so you feel as though you were deceived... Although in this case, by the box office...

The title of this post really stood out because Im currently working on my first novel, and the words are so true! Since I was a little girl, I heard my mother saying something that influenced me a great deal. "There´s very little difference in doing things right or wrong. Think about it, you put in the same effort, the time and will. The only distinction is focus and attention to detail. The devil is in the detail". 

My mom is a wise woman and she's had plenty of experience doing things wrong, so I guess she knows exactly what she´s talking about. And this sound advice is incredibly simple to apply to our every day life, remember, it´s all about the little things. Adjust the wheels of the car just a little tighter or use a condom... the details!!!

Like the saying goes, - Im a writer therefore I rewrite. - This is exactly what Ive been doing and it´s also true that there comes a point when you need to stop with the revisions before driving yourself crazy... When your dog already knows the novel by heart, it´s a good sign that you've been through it enough...

So let´s carry on with this journey (some call it perfectionism), you and I, together... whether you're writing something yourself or making an effort to finish going through my posts. And let´s do it right, thoroughly and with conviction. Otherwise, you'll be hearing from my mother!

{celebrating the anniversaire of a sweet transvestite}

The great Tim Curry turns 68 today and we still love him. He´s one of those character actors that just seems to nail each performance and turning it into a classic! We worship Pennywise and Frank n Furter and so many other memorable ones.

Enjoy this sweet musical number from The Rocky Horror Show...

{the magical art of tale fabrication}

Or storytelling. This warning appears as the opening line in  the movie Sweet Talk, a writer who lost his words. Delilah aids him towards a whole new discovery...

{old habits never die, they just hibernate}

One of my all-time favorite authors Bret Easton Ellis once wrote this line. Less Than Zero was the novel. It later became a movie. He once dated Donna Tartt, another one of my all-time favorite authors. I wouldn´t bring that up except that the actresses that play his female characters in the movie adaptation of his novel, always resemble her a little. Curious fact. Moving on.

I loved watching Less Than Zero again. Hadn't seen it in a very long time. Its not a guilty pleasure, like say 84 Charing Cross Road, that I watch every Sunday. This is one of those once-a-decade kind of movie in which you're happy to see familiar faces: The Other Brat Pack: Andrew McCarthy, James Spader, Jami Gertz and the extraordinary performance of Robert Downey Jr., he really is a brilliant actor when he takes off the mask made of uh, Iron ... More on the Brat Pack II and Robert coming to your local blog very soon...

That phrase regarding old habits, which was pronounced by the James Spader character really touched a nerve. Habits, it seems as though were always rebelling against them, fighting for modification or better yet elimination. Some "experts" have persuaded all human kind to consider that a habit, any habit, can be transformed in 21 days. Are you telling me that after 30 years of biting my nails I will succumb to the belief that I can stop doing it in a measly 3 weeks?! Well, some of us choose to believe, some of us are way too rational for this. I am the latter.

Which is why I was happy to hear these words, somebody was finally able to verbalize my disbelief. You can´t get rid of habits, you can bury them, ignore them, insult them, write about them on your blog... but they will always be a part of you... No matter if you change continents, friends, partners, eating habits or decide to do that dreadful thing that I watch people doing in the mornings around the park, ah! jog.... 

True, we have developed these so called habits, we weren´t born with them, so logic would have you thinking that because it´s not part of our nature or gene pool, it´s just a matter of adjusting the calibre of your will power and off you go to change-land... I think we should settle for the good news that we are able to withhold the impulse of re-usage of habits, but making them disappear as if by magic... Makes you think why you're still tempted to have that extra bowl of pasta or why you want to rip the nail polish off your nails when they are looking so pretty....

Addictions are habits, right? Why would they suggest that a recovering addict will forever and always be an addict if you were able to really break the habit and cliche-ing-ly say that it will die eventually? Exactly, the habit will continue to subsist in the back burner of your mind, waiting attentively for the the trigger that will provoke the urge to see daylight. So we have to read loads of self help books, and monitor our 12 steps to who knows where in order to pacifically "push it real good" to the back of our minds... I knew Salt n´ Pepa would come in handy someday...

So, to summarize, we continue to be a psychological mess. Im sorry but I cant find something more appropriate to describe the present moment. This is me, in all of my splendor, with my good and bad habits. Take what you were given and make the most out of it. I think we spend way too much time trying to improve, change, resize, and upholster. If only we would invest some of that time trying to accept and just applaud our strange habits, life would be much more tolerable. Let those damn habits hibernate in a peaceful setting....

{you know Im pretty sure all my life I always dreamed in black and white, last night I dreamed in color}

One of the last phrases in the dialogue between Demi Moore and Jon Cryer´s characters in the 1984 movie No Small Affair. I loved these words written by Craig Bolotin. (A whole lot more than the movie, it was well intended though)

{memories of the mountain...}

My toe nail finally came off. I say finally because it was predicted by those around me that the destiny of this particular toe nail was written the minute we got off the mountain. A rock climbing injury, shoes perhaps too tight, a whole lot of friction going on. When the nail started showing shades of brownish and black I knew something was not right but since it was still attached to my toe,  I just assumed it would heal and life would go on as usual. That was then, this is now.

Hard-Core Hiking, I learned after this experience, is not something that should be taken lightly. There are certain precautions and measures that must be taken into consideration, should one decide to endure in such dramatic activities. I made fun of my guide/ friend all the way to the top for being so thoroughly equipped he resembled a chubbier Inspector Gadget. Who´s laughing now? Whos´s toe nail is sitting in a drawer waiting to be exposed as evidential proof of a sad sad story such as this one?

Well, at least I was able to apply some enamel on it just in time. So now it sits in a drawer, on it´s own but it remains girly and flirtatious. My toe... au contraire... blackish and old maiden-ly. Until it decides to grow a bit and Im able to resort to "damn falsies" (that´s from Catcher in the Rye, Ive always wanted to use it in a sentence!), Im stuck with an unappealing, bandage covered, antisocial foot-header. It used to be the leader, the surface scratcher and the teaser... Now, it´s just a toe. A naked one.

Had I not gone on this adventure up the mountains, none of this would have happened but I have to confess that this activity made me learn a lot (I now hold an MBA on what shoes to wear to what activity). I may no longer have that pretty nail (which Im hoping will grow back in the next decade) but I have some contrasting memories. I reached the top in the end (the very end, my friends got there an hour before me), after some altitude malfunctions and few minor setbacks such as wanting to quit the trail half way up, throwing a tantrum and my best friend almost being pulverized by the rocks, well that´s life right? 

Truth is, if  choices in life were down to going up to the mountains or not going, my current answer would be quite the opposite of when I did decide to do this hazardous and daring escapade. No way, no how! Im never ever doing this again! There I said it, yeah yeah yeah, I reached a goal, I climbed to the top.. It was strenuous,  it was tiring, I suffered like crazy, and on top of it all I lost a toe nail! There are certain things in life that should remain the way they are without hassling around them. Like the rock that -God put there for a purpose and Im not sure you should remove it - rock (The Goonies).. Let the mountain be high and let me be reminded that there are plenty of other ways to enjoy nature...

“Tough toenails, tiger. What you want and what you get are usually two entirely different things.” (Nicholas Sparks)

{finders... keepers}

The Words. I recently watched this movie for the second time, you should always watch a movie at least twice, especially if it contains large dosis of eye candy in which in any case  causes chunks of distraction and deviates your mind into random thoughts pulling you away from the plot every now and then. (FYI, I have watched every John Cusack film at least 30 times - eye candy of the beholder, don´t question it!). Anyway, as I was saying I laid there with my big bowl of popcorn and went through The Words experience again. Im naturally drawn to films about writers and books, even the really weird ones like something and something about Sylvia Plath... This movie in particular brought to mind something completely off the plot... A huge question! How much of us is really us? Huh? Believe me, Ive thought about formulating this matter in different words but as a premise I tend to keep things simple so it´s the best I could come up with...

How much of us is really us, in us... How many of the words we speak are ours, the words we write. Two nights ago I had dinner with my mom who called to my attention the fact that I had stolen phrases and body language from her!! I told her - how can I steal your body language when you still have it on you? - Well, what she meant was that I had become a cheap copy of her, though she sweetly implied this by saying she was happy of having her disciple  honoring her in such a way... Even our voice tones match! -"Hi Laura, how are you?" - "It´s Ale... again!" - happened constantly back in the day...

When you stop to think about it, if you desire to do so, if not just keep living in ignorance my friend, no difference whatsoever... But if you do get your head spinning around this, you will find that you are a composite of everything and everyone around you. I mean, is there such a thing as a unique thought, or has everything already been said in the past? My guess, it´s been done and it´s been said, we just reestructure it and label it - new idea -. And it will continue to happen as new generations take over, generations that are bits and pieces of the ones who came before them.

It´s interesting to see that we not only carry the genes, I have my father´s nose and my grandmother´s eyes. I carry the family karma (according to my astrologer Marisa) but on top of that we are genuine mini-mes´ of our predecessors and everyone we´ve come into contact with throughout our lives. Who didn´t want to walk, dress or talk like their friends in high school? Pull your hair behind your ears like Joey Potter in the Creek (c´mon, admit it!) or sway your hips like Julia Roberts in... everything she was ever in. We adopt the walk and we adopt the talk, otherwise we wouldn´t rely on famous quotes to appear smarter, Im terribly sorry if "You can´t handle the truth!"...

The way I see it, there´s nothing wrong with taking someone else´s creation, just consider waiting for the perfect time in order to avoid being catalogued as a plagiarist, these things happen you know... and also keep in mind that Google stores everything, forever and ever!!! 

{a man goes into a restaurant... }

Some people have a knack for telling jokes, Im not one of them. Despite being a naturally born story teller and having a few years of drama studies to brag about, I suck at telling jokes. If I am to repeat a joke some else has told me, I need to hear more than a few times and then study some of the gesturing that adds that additional je nais se quoi to the whole plot... even so I get pity responses and smirks that resemble more a stomach ache than actual pleasure! Ive been trying for ages, the ones that talk about the rabbi, the priest and the... see what I mean? I cant even remember!

I do know a lot of people that are great at it and others who insist on trying. With the latter, Ive learned to go along and laugh in a timely manner despite knowing that they are just as bad as I am! The ones that are good are very good. They have a whole repertoire up their sleeve and even come up with their own material. I call these the stand-up wannabes, yes Im talking to you, get on that stage and entertain me! And if you´re really eager in perfecting your skills, click here: How to tell a joke. And let´s not leave out that guy/girl that tells the one joke they know to everybody... and dares to ask "Have you heard this one yet?"...

Then theres that other fortuitous breed that is funny with or without jokes, like my friend Xavi for example, everything that comes out of his mouth is hilarious and I so admire him for that. Anytime, anyplace, like they say out there.. "Its not what you say but how you say it".. and be complemented as Julia Louis-Dreyfuss was in the last issue of Rolling Stone, "Julia's not just a natural comedic performer – she's a natural comedic brain, wow!!!  If you´re inclined to become one of those, check out this website: How to be funny without telling jokes. I can´t guarantee anything good will come of it but at least you know you´ve tried...

Telling jokes is an art form, theres good ideas and timing involved. Your words, other people´s words. Ive heard of -Funny Retreats- being available in order to master this creative force. If you're a guy, it´s guaranteed you'll get a lot of girls... once you become funny... So as you can see, it´s quite essential for everyone to pick up on their giggle game...

As for me... Im sticking to the self deprecation format that has given me outstanding results. And for today, let me share Eddie Murphy with you, the quintessential funny man! (FYI, I quote a lot Coming to America, it´s my all-time favorite comedy!)

{life before the internet was different. occasionally, it was amazing -- there were mixed tapes and people used the phone book to make prank calls! }

Trying to decipher Jumpin' Jack Flash's lyrics - Jumpin´Jack Flash 

Whoopi G (Terry Doolittle): I was raised by two lesbians?
Come on, Mick. Fuck a duck!

You had to play a song on the cassette player and stop it a thousand times while  trying to get the words out of it!

 - ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬  Love lifts us up where we were wrong♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ . 

Sometimes it wasn´t easy!!

{i think stories of the supernatural are fundamentally optimist, don´t you?}

"If there are ghosts then that means we survive death". Stanley Kubrick asked Stephen King in the middle of the night. That´s what filming "The Shining" can do to you. What followed was Mr King´s response of how hell fitted into that picture to what Mr Kubrick replied "I don´t believe in hell".

Which brings up another question: The question of Inconsistency and how much of it is acceptable. We all know there´s no such thing as slightly pregnant but what about wanting to do good things for the planet and throwing trash on the streets at the same time, or liking dogs some days of the week. How about healthy living except for doughnuts (in my case Haagen Dazs)? As humans it seems as though we crave inconsistency, we enjoy going halves (this DOES NOT apply for dating) and the fifty-fifty rules of the universe. Why is this? Why are we constantly battling a mass of rules set by society that encourage an all or nothing way of life? Is it a matter of character? Why do these rules exist in the first place, where has all this come from? Pardon my inquisitive randomness, Im a bit of a control-freak when it comes to things that I cant find an answer to...

Doesn´t infidelity qualify as a halfsy? We commit to someone yet we cant commit to someone... Its like going to the gym and sitting in the locker room! Or (and this may offend some) going to work at an office and checking your facebook page all day instead of doing what you're being paid to do. It seems as though the more obliged we are towards something or someone, the further away we want to run. We are all natural born rebels. Its not that we can´t engage, we just refuse to do so. Wild guess is the way nature has us programmed and for what its worth, its great to be able to blame nature for falling off the latest low carb diet!

{My mentor Barbara Sher was very amusing when when referring to this subject on one of her lectures on the secret to success and laid emphasis on our gene pool and what nature has in store for us... "The best thing to do is don´t be consistent, it´s like -keep a moving target-take vitamins and then don´t, jog and then don´t, stuff yourself and then don´t. The odds are in your favor if you're not too consistent...}

How can you not love this woman!! Think about it, it´s absolutely true, we can´t control anything, that´s all an illusion right? And Im more and more convinced that we cannot fight our nature, the same way other species can´t. We can do things the best way possible, with our limitations of course. This is such a relief, its not my fault I cant be perfect. Don´t you feel better already?! And people calling me incongruent, how dare they! I always knew there had to be something else...

And the most pleasing part of of all this is the fact that inconsistency if actually quite fun. You can break paradigms, make up new rules, in fact you can go all psycho and that´s ok, Mother Nature intended it this way! Can you imagine a world where people were constantly changing their minds, going from white to black and back in a heart beat? Guess what? That is the world we live in, only that the faithful to their inconsistency have been outcasted or committed, but it´s the way we are meant to live...

Isn´t it a liberating thought to be able to think one way and change your mind the next, without being judged or criticized? The rules of the game are changing every single second, new diets, new business models, new ways to communicate, and quite avant garde approaches to relationships. So who is to say what is right and what is wrong? And who cares? It will again change tomorrow when a new idea is presented to us. And who invented the hard structure of Consistency anyway?!

{that girl, the one with the braids in her hair? what do they call them, corn husks?}

"Hopefully as you get older you get more selfless. That would be probably a good goal.

 I don't know if we do, though". John Cusack

{a day without laughter is a day wasted}

Charlie Chaplin was a wise man. He understood de importance of doing comedy and how it made an impact in people´s lives. Funny, comedy, laughter, jokes... basic needs. There is nothing in the world I would trade for a good laugh. A movie, falling on the street, sharing moments with your friends (the funny ones, obviously). I cant account for the amount of times Ive gone home with a big ache in my rib cage after a long session of giggles or as wikipedia explains it as audible contractions of the diaphragm. I was just recalling with a close friend about the time we got a laugh attack at a taco shop the day of her birthday. Nothing would make it stop. Nothing. And we couldn´t even figure out what had caused it! Needless to say what a great night it turned to be, our chuckles turned the whole place on, you see, laughter is contagious!

Luckily Im an easy target, I find humor in most things. Sometimes its a nervous reaction, true, but most times Im simply enjoying myself to the max. I believe in the power of cracking up, theres no sport, drink or stress reliever that can have the effect of this old fashioned immune system booster that not only relaxes your entire body but triggers the release of endorphins and even protects your heart. Now tell where to find an old piece of fish that can do all that! So much for Omega3 promoters!!

Go and have a laugh old chump and if your Seinfeld dvds are not cutting it and you´ve already watched all the Christopher Walken movies out there (It´s his birthday you know)...give me a shout, Im positive Ill find a topic of conversation that will give you something to smile about...

For the brainiacs: source for theories on laughter

{try using it in a sentence: callous}

{a little thought on what love really is}

These are words expressed by my mentor Barbara, I admire her vision and the way she expresses herself so logically yet profound... And you guessed it, she´another guest @ my fictitious dinner party!

"Do you know what love really is? Not that romantic stuff that nature tricks us with. To love is to be able to see, but to really see. To love a person is to see that person. Not as someone that can make you happy and give you what you need, it can even be someone who you can´t stand to be near or it´s someone that causes you trouble. But they are unique and astonishing. Some of us see colors that way, or animals, or furniture, time or words." - Barbara Sher

I ♥ WORDS

{art cannot be modern. art is primordially eternal}

Egon Schiele Autoportrait

I was invited to an exhibit at a local museum this week. Sadly it´s not really worth commenting about it... At the same time I bumped into an article regarding detailed information on Wes Anderson´s new film "Grand Budapest Hotel" and the art work that appears as a center piece of the film. You can read the article right here. There is an appearance of some work by Egon Schiele, one of my favorite artists of all time which Im quite eager to see...

This Austrian expressionist, protege of Klimt, despite dying at a very young age (just 28) left behind a grand amount of art work to be admired by generations to come. Intense, erotic and tormented are the 3 words most used in all his biographies, accompanied by a profound need for understanding of his technique... -"His jagged lines arose more from psychological and spiritual feeling than from aesthetic considerations"- Controversial, disturbing, passionate, eclectic, compassionate, progressive, emotional.

"Excess of life" and "agony of thinking" are just as present as dark forces: "demons! – brake the violence! – your language, - your signs, - your power!", proclaims Egon Schiele. The range of his contradictory feelings culminates in the paradoxical and final finding: "Everything is lively dead".

If you ever find yourself wandering the streets of Vienna, don´t forget to visit his atelier at 101 Hietzinger Haupstrasse

Here are some of my favorite E.S.pieces: 

Reclining Women

Four Trees

And the very well known (even replicated by Julianne Moore and Daisy Duck) Seated woman with a bent keen... also referred to as Seated woman with legs drawn up. This painting was completed in 1917 so they were bound to play around with the name a little!

www.egon-schiele.com

{cherish forever what makes you unique, 'cuz you're really a yawn if it goes}

Bette Midler is also on my pretend dinner guest list. (Now you´re just dying to know who the others are... Im gonna need a bigger table, that´s for sure...). I admire this woman for so many things, she´s done it all, the music, the movies, the words, the interviews, Broadway and the -making the world a better place-. The Divine Miss M starred in 2 of my all time favorite motion pictures: Scenes From A Mall and Big Business, and yes Ive probably seen Beaches about a hundred and twenty times. This woman can´t help but stand out, with that distinctive pitch and her incendiary curls, this is a born star...

But beating the drums at her own rhythm, that is the quality I most admire. How many people in the world (stars and other species) are doin´their own thing? Admit it, you know it and I know it, most people on this planet are followers. Im not objecting, just stating. It would be very chaotic if everyone decided to lead, we couldn't even dance tango! Personally I cant be like everybody else, Im a bit too rebellious to simply get in line. Ever since I was a child I wanted to do things differently from the rest, I didn't even like wearing the same clothes as my friends. I didn't strive to look or be different, I simply was. And that has only been reinforced as I got older and closer to myself, all this that we talk about self esteem and respect, the more you know yourself, you can make changes and become that individual that you love wholeheartedly. So in a way it goes hand in hand, the only way to be comfortable drawing your own path is really knowing yourself, strengths and weaknesses... and most importantly care 0.1% about what others think of you. That´s why I love Bette, she can be genuine and you can hear her screaming in all her performances, interviews and even on her website : "This is me in all of my splendor, take it or leave it". I wanna be Bette! Seriously take a look at her website, it´s to die for:

www.bettemidler.com

Whenever I speak about Uniqueness, two very particular quotes come to mind. The first is Oscar Wilde´s famous 'Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.'. The second is one that I found in Marie Forleo´s twitter that says something like: "Comparison is creative kryptonite. Stay in your own game". Wow, thats some powerful stuff right there. I had a huge crisis when I came across this, I mean, how can you help but copy those you admire and have made such an impact in my life (in my case many writers, Ive been wanting to be the next Salinger for as long as I can remember). But whats interesting is that I never contemplated the idea that I could perhaps be better than Salinger... Now, hear me out for a minute, Im not saying that I am, if you wanna know the truth. What I mean is it seems as though we are terrified of putting something different out there, copying others is a bit like staying in our comfort zone (not that there´s anything wrong with that- for some). But what better way to contribute to the world than finding your own voice, in whatever you do. You're basically doing what you were born to do, your way, because there is no one else out there quite like you...

I personally have never met someone like me, with my life experience and my quirky ways of viewing the world. And I strongly believe that you don´t know what you're capable of until you access and open the master gates of your being and let loose a flood of ideas and spontaneity. The people I most admire in the world are those who make it their life´s work to separate themselves from the herd. The best teachers in the world are those who encourage you to think for yourself, create and make your own decisions, right? Perhaps you do need to be a bit of a rebel and maybe its not a place of easy access. But it it your natural state, it´s just about being honest with yourself which we all know it´s hard after we´ve grown up hearing things like: "Why can´t you be more like the Miller boy?" . So it´s not up to our parents and teachers, this is a decision that we need to make for ourselves. But when you let go of everything and you start being you, that´s when the magic happens. After all who can sing "Wind beneath my wings" better than Bette?